I also would like to point that I don’t blame her for all the marriage issues. I own my part and I’m doing my work on growing up from this. I do want to become a better person. I wasn’t like I am nowadays. I’m a complete loner and I have a lot of trouble socializing. I don’t feel comfortable on bars (I don’t drink) neither on closed spaces or crowds. I been working on my ptsd doing emdr therapy and things are improving a lot. I’m able to sleep now what has reduced my bitterness and mood swings. I guess most of my problem with the situation is the fact that she doesn’t recognize her fault. She has said that I pushed her away and she craved to feel wanted but she’s insist that she is not having an affair. We have become more distant. I was trying to be nicer but just to get even more frustrated to see that she has a better relationship with her phone than she does with me. And she says she’s working on the marriage but she’s adamant to go to IC. I know I have lots of work to do on myself but her ambivalence just makes me doubt that things are going to work
