My suggestion would really be to take the spotlight off of W and focus on you. The challenge is that due to your current situation, trying to correct the sins of the past by pursuing her will make things worse versus better because she has a roadblock up that will prevent her from being able to receive.
She needs to have space to process her feelings and flush out her resentment without feeling pursued.
If you use that time to address her complaints in your own life, it will be noticed, but you have to do it *for you* and not peacock it in front of her or she won't believe it.
She complained you didn't plan enough activities far enough in advance? Start planning things for you and the kids to do, and plan it in advance. She'll notice.
It sounds like your analysis of her complaints is fundamentally a "Five Love Languages" issue so I definitely recommend getting that book and reading it.
Acc
Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11 Start Reconcile: 8/15/11 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced) In a New Relationship: 3/2015
