If you have co-dependency traits, then that could answer why you are drawn to women who seem as if they need your help, or to be rescued. The damsel in distress.......whether it's their own immaturity, unresolved issues from their past, some threat or fear in their current situation, etc.
I have a sibling that was M three times. All three men abused her. All three had similar looks, personalities, etc. All three lived lifestyles opposite of the church-going life she knew while growing up. Our family members could see the resemblance in all three men. When I pointed it out to her, she agreed. However, if she ever knew why she was drawn to them and ended with unhealthy MR's, she never admitted it.
I said that^^^^ to say we are often blind to what seems obvious to those who do not have emotions attached, or the same psychological makeup. I applaud you for the massive effort you are putting into making yourself an improved individual. There is much hope for people who will admit they need to do something or to get help. But those who stubbornly refuse to read a book or talk to a therapist........are very frustrating to me.
I encourage you to continue doing what is working for you.
(((big hugs)))
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
