Not sure what to do. . .can anyone help?

[mbe76]

Major but sad update. After yesterday she was acting all weird with me when I got home from work. I have to fill in some paperwork which was upstairs in our bedroom and she immediately came upstairs to be in the same room as me, she asked me what I was doing and I told her and then she accused me of being secretive, she then started shouting and I asked her why she was being so angry and I asked her if she had anything to be secretive. I noticed she had left her phone on the side and I picked it up and asked her what she was hiding and as it was unlocked I checked the phone and I could see a message from her OM signed off with lots of xxx's and she had obviously deleted all the previous messages- the phones she uses are both mine and I said until you treat me with resepect I will keep hold of the phones. I said that we had agreed that I would not tolerate 3 people in our marriage and she had crossed that line. She then started shouting at me again and screamed "i want a D" i said that is her decision but I refuse to discuss anything while you are shouting at me, and I reminded her that I would take the necesary steps to protect myself and that I was going out. I didnt tell her where etc. But as I have been advised not to leave the marital home I came back and she was blaming me again. I told her if it is her decision to carry on the A then must accept her responsibilities, the 2 yo then started crying and she went upstairs and hasn't been down since. I grabbed a duvet from upstairs and I will be on the couch