My step son is now out of the house, my WW has not said a word to me in over 2 weeks. We only communicate via text in regards to my D4. I am now in a place of acceptance with a little bit of anger mixed in. There are days where I feel strong and others that I feel like a bowl of mush which I'm assuming is to be expected. I've been keeping busy, going to the gym, spending more times with friends and I even met a female friend that has been keeping me company, nothing romantic just talking over text and phone.
I still have these fantasies at night especially where I find out this was all a bad dream and I will wake up and things will be fine. Other times I feel that she will walk through the door and apologize for all the wrong that she was done. When these feelings come I try and tell myself quickly that this is not the case, that it's a fantasy and leave the past in the past lets move forward.
I see a future without her and it pains me because I miss her, but there really isn't anymore her there. She has passed, even though she's living the person that I knew is gone and it's impossible to bring her back, I will need to let go, move on and forgive myself for the mistakes I've made. I will find someone else in the future who will be my partner good or bad and from there we will build a life together. I forgive her and now I will let her go.
