I just hear that you had the run of the mill garden variety marital issues. Everyone has them but not every couple works through them. You have one hand clapping over there.

Regarding what you wrote about feeling indecisive about the purchase due to having humble beginnings and also weighing whether it is Christian or not, this sounds like a good place to do a bit of inner work. You are quite hard on yourself.

What I am finding is that I often look for the perfect solution--the silver bullet. And rather than recognizing it doesn't always exist, I can drive myself crazy with indecision looking for it. I think it's the fixer in me. I am learning to recognize that rarely is there a perfect solution and it can be quite freeing to just make a decision in these circumstances rather than drowning in analysis. Just something that helps, maybe useful to you as well?

Take care.

Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13
BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself
BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room"
8/15: H back to MBR
10/15: H back in dorm room
1/18: H files, now divorced