i am sorry, Meg--but he is playing games with you... very immature... he pretty much sums it up himself--he will likely find fault with everything you do... when he got up to go outside, you should have just let him go... in my opinion, he is being cruel to you... testing you... you cannot win... he knows you don't want to lose him, and he is putting everything on you... even the responsibility of reading his mind... and you keep going for it... you believe that what you did in your marriage was so horrible that you deserve to be treated this way... i hope you are able to come out of that mind set soon...