Thanks for popping in on my stitch. All I can say is that our situations and W's seem very similar aside from mine being actively engaged in an affair. My W stated the same about the lack of affection and I felt the same way as you about detaching. So I continued to let her reach out to me and I reciprocated in turn. We even got to the point where she was snuggling up with me in bed. But it meant nothing to her and was only a way to keep me stuck and emotionally attached. Exactly where she wanted me to be. Your W may not be actively engaged in an affair but trust me she is working on it.
I am not telling you what you should do because Lord knows I didn't want to accept this advice either but read my stitch and see how much spinning I have done and have gotten nowhere. You need to take action before she does find someone else otherwise it becomes even more difficult.
