Sex would not cause me to become unhealthily emotionally attached. it's a part of dating that happens and can be enjoyed. I think sex might take on different levels and feelings as I do become emotionally attached, but it isn't what does the attaching for me in the first place. I can definitely keep objectivity.
My usual speed be really fast? No, I don't think so. And in any case if it was, I don't think it hurt the R at all. Maybe hurt me more when it ended, but it didn't do the damage to the R.
It's not a planned sleepover in that sense. I am going by him tomorrow night, a half hour away, we will be out late and there will be drinks. he kindly offered me the option and said he would take the couch and I could have his bed. We didn't make a date for sex.
The history I worry about repeating: Ignoring actual red flags and getting into a situation which has too much complication such as distance, or going very different places in life like being done with kids or having kids. I tend to entangle myself in situations where love just isn't enough and have huge obstacles. That is the history I really don't want to repeat. I need to make sure the situation is somewhat ideal.
That being said, he does know I am done having kids. I put it right out there. Otherwise, this is finally good where we have no reason to rush a lot of the stuff we don't want to. He isn't meeting my kid until I deem it time. He doesn't need to meet the parents yet. he doesn't need to spend a bunch of nights over a week. He has his own place. We can take things at whatever pace we feel comfortable with, not because situation makes us do otherwise. That I like a lot. I for once feel like I have some control over the situation.
