At one time i really wanted to reconcile with my ex as well. No judgement here. But now with distance, i see things differently. Kind of like, what advice would you give your sister or daughter if she was in the same situation as you are in now?
Basically the only way at this point for reconciliation to occur is if your husband wants it. And he has to really really want it for it to really work.
Blu waves writes about how she did everything wrong, did not follow the techniques correctly but eventually reconciliation happened. But her ex came back begging, and willing to do anything to make it work. He came back once he realized OW was a pos and blu wave had moved on. This takes a while.
I think if they dont really want it badly enough they will eventually leave again and you will be walking on eggshells the entire time . See psychsaras posts (shes db'd perfectly)
So what can you do? Honestly. Your only chance is to do nothing.
If you change to cater to him, he will make the excuse that he is angrier because you should have done that before.
Your only chance at this point is to build your life like you would if you knew there was no chance at reconciliation. Do what will be best for you. Exercise, GAL, enjoy your kids. Protect yourself financially. Dont address or initiate any relationship talks. If he wants to, he will.
A lot of these guys are the grass is greener type or i dont want to be part of a party that will have me type. Once they see that you have moved on, then they might come back.
If you havent moved on i think there is no chance.
So the advice is the same. Just worry about you right now. Put him out of the equation. Thats the only real chance you have of him wanting to come back.
You need to be in a place where you are emotionally and mentally in a place to determine what type of relationship you want. Not in a position of weakness (where most of us are acute BD)
