You can post anywhere on the forums. If you think you would feel more comfortable in Newcomers, you can post there. Sandi is excellent over on Newcomers and has a great insight into walkaways.
When you state that you are separated, are you living in the inlaws home or are you living elsewhere or you and your w have separate bedrooms?
Did something happen 18-24 months before she "dim" on you? Does she work or a stay at home mom? Could it be that the living arrangements are not helping? Maybe she feels trapped living under the same roof w/her parents. Has she said anything about needing a change? Living w/the parents and having children as well as step children can be wearing, especially if she has no other interests.
The little bit of info that you gave us is a step in the right direction. What do you do in the way of hobbies/interests? I suggest that you take a walk around the forum and read some of the other postings and you'll get a much better feel of what you may wish to post about your situation.
One thing that you need to do is keep the focus on you and your children. Give her plenty of space and time to think about things. One thing...when she appears interested in having conversations w/you, listen to what she's saying, validate and affirm her discussions and don't appear too eager to keep the dialogue going. If she is depressed, then it's an effort to just get up and get through the day for her. Be sure to acknowledge when she has done something for you or the kids that she hasn't been doing. Complimenting and acknowledging what she's done will go a long way.
Bottom line, you need to keep the focus on you and your children. Right now, they need you more than ever before because their mother is off in her own little world and if she can't help herself, she surely can't help them. Just remember, you didn't break her, therefore you can't fix her...she has to do that on her own time clock, which is very slow.
