(((BIG HUGS))) Your anger is totally justified and he is still trying to push your buttons to see how far he can get away with. He is losing his power/control over you and that's something that you WH cannot stand (see what's happening on HaWho thread). That's the very first time that you are really enforcing any kind of boundaries, he was always able to escape the consequences of his actions/words by being "charming" for a few days...
Be ready for him to get very nasty once you will file, avoid face to face communications, ask him to communicate with you through emails instead of messages, even better through your lawyers. He will try to make you angry, to make you scream, to make your lose your mind, DO NOT FALL for that. Keep it very professional and short, leave the room if necessary. Don't accept any deadlines from him, do only things if you feel like it and after having talked with your lawyer. Keep records of everything, specially in regard of the kids. Take pictures of what you have in the house, copy what you need to copy. Protect your papers from him, get a safe at the bank. Don't tell him what are your intentions ahead of time. Reread your threads to find proofs.
He will try for sure to go for 50/50 so during the divorce proceedings (so he can pressure you to give up on few things or just to be plain mean...) you will have somehow to come up with some kind of temporary child custody arrangements, keep track about when/what he was supposed to do and what happened. Be very careful he is "nice", it means generally that he needs something that he is not to your advantage.
It's going to be tough, but once he will be gone from your house, you will feel more in peace, you won't have to walk on eggshells anymore.
You are stronger and tougher than you think.
You don't know what the future will be, but it seems that you reach a point where you feel you cannot live that way anymore. Trust your guts!
Nobody changes unless forced! Let him face reality and consequences. Be ready for a few tantrums...
Me 52+ WH 57+ Married 20 + Piecing since 2016 (ready to give up...)
