I found out my husband was legally separated when we met. I wasn't interested in dating due to that and managed to stave him off a couple of months. We ended up going out - best first date story EVER! I really wasn't sure I would go out again... but he was persistent. Our second date a month later was off the cuff and just as great. I wasn't in a rush as we both had kids and hectic schedules but another month later and our third date it was it for us.

Sure I had my doubts but I know he had been dating someone else prior to me and a little during our first dates that seemed serious enough that I thought his rebound relationship was out of the way.

I told him I wouldn't meet his parents until he was divorced but it kept getting pushed back as EW was dumped by her attorney, didn't have one so was going to just use same as my husband to suddenly getting another attorney. I eventually relented and met his parents and he ended up moving in with me a few months before his divorce was officially final.

Ugh - I know now that was probably not the ideal situation but we were so truly happy and really in love.

As for EW in the beginning I really took her side on things when I would hear my husband complain but I got a wake up call when she showed up at my doorstep and threatened to hurt my then 8yr old child. Over the years I have seen her behavior myself first hand and my husband did not exaggerate much. She used her kids in the divorce and even years later and my husband missed out on big chunks of time as she would tie things up in court with restraining orders years after their divorce.

My husband had both PA's and EA's in his previous marriage. He really struggled with divorce as he didn't want to be a part time parent. My understanding is she went and got him an apartment and moved him out of the marital home. I don't think it was as easy he walked out and never looked back. I think he ended up in a crisis center for stress and probably tried to go back to marriage? I inadvertently found a notebook that must have been a journal during that time - he was trying to figure things out and trying to look at the positives. Ultimately they may not have been on the same page at the same time? I don't think it was as easy to leave as he seems to have told me.

I'm sure this information is probably damagaing the chances of my marriage surviving my husbands "I don't love you anymore".

My husband has said he shouldn't have gotten married again. That he should have taken more alone time after his divorce. He should have gotten to know me better. Those words sting. He pursued me. He asked me to marry him. To hear now he sees it all as a mistake has me reeling as to what I could possibly do to help him see it otherwise.