Newbie In Need Of Guidance #2

[rminer]

During this time was she trying to tell me she wanted to talk and I missed it? She never once said she did, and all of our conversations were in front of and/or involved the kids. We never got close to the R subject in that time and never talked about anything personal. We were never alone at any time. Was she waiting for me to make a move?

Not sure what you mean. A sexual advance?

No, not sexual. Going back to the way I was during the three weeks I was tripping over myself to try to win her back or make some other grand gesture to show her I want her back.

There was a poster recently on here name Hermes. (check out his thread). His W was in an open A that he new about. He tried to nice his way back into the relationship, cleaned the house, bought her gifts, planned her business trips, ran her baths etc. Needless to say it did not end well for him. One of his last couple posts he wrote about his number one regret was that he didn't kick her cheating ass out of the house the minute he found out about the A.

Just to be clear, I did not fix the sink because she asked me to, which she didn't. I fixed it because I used it and it was backed up. All I did was snake the drain and it was working again. A whole five minute process.

Right now I'm sticking to the 37 rules. I'm not doing "H" things for her unless absolutely necessary and I am setting boundaries, at least personal ones and for the kids.

I know you keep saying I should kick her out. While I would love to make that strong of a statement, there are other things at play that I need to get answers to from an atty. Until that happens, I won't be kicking her out.