hi, Gisela... i just have to ask, why are you willing to let your husband stay with you while he is actively looking for another wife? that has to be one of the most selfish things that one spouse can do to the other... of course this hurts you... how dare he feel so entitled... don't settle for this behavior... i know it seems scary because you do not want a divorce, and you do not want to lose him... but honestly, he is already gone... he is done up to where he feels inconvenienced... what i mean is, he says he is done with the marriage... yet, he has not left... why? because it's easier for him to stay where he is until he really has to move, and that time will come when he has found his next wife... so he uses you... your kindness... your willingness to take the blame...
do you really want to be that person who let her WH--and yes, he is wayward, stay with her until he found his next love? when that happens, he will leave you physically... that will hurt you to the nth degree... you need to work at detaching now... and you need to not make things so comfy cozy for him as he dates--even online... do not play the fool here... and that is what is doing to you right now--playing you for the fool... you are worth more than that... let him know it...
