I had another coaching session with Leni last night. I filled her in on what happened in the last week and she's pretty convinced my wife is having an affair. She instructed me to continue to remain friendly and not confront her as that will push her further away which is not what I want right now.
She wants me to reach out to my wife every once in a while as I would a friend - ask her how her day was or how she's doing. We did an exercise where I answered questions as my wife. It helped gain some insight and perspective into why my wife wants a divorce and is possibly seeking another person.
I'm continuing GAL and my 180s, the prospect of my wife having an affair hasn't changed anything for me as the possibility of it has always been in the back of my mind since she asked for a divorce. I'm actually having a few friends over tonight for dinner - the first time in a long while I've had a group of friends at my house.
Leni also wants me to begin writing what is essentially a last resort letter. She wants me to apologize for the things I did that lead to the breakdown of our marriage. She suggested that I write that I'm working on improving myself through books, coaching, and therapy - and that the changes are for myself because I know the man I want to be regardless of what happens with my wife and I.
She instructed me to NOT send the letter until I've reviewed it with her in our next session. My feelings for my wife haven't changed, I still love her and understand that an affair is a symptom of the problems in our marriage. I also understand that the chance of my wife coming back is very low, but at the end of everything I want to be able to say I tried everything I could.
If there is any chance of reconciliation I need to get my wife back on my side before discussing any of the things she did that contributed to our marital issues - which I understand can take many, many months.
M:2.5 T:8 H:31 W:27 S:12 BD:1/4/2018 W Moved Out: 1/8/2018 OM Confirmed: 2/19/18
