Out of curiosity, I checked this forum to see where I was 6 months ago. Wow. The good news is that the advice found here works and in my case, maybe too well. Things have drastically shifted. Between August and December, I started to pull away from my wife and seek other interests. She in turn started to make things better. But I came to the realization I was not happy in our marriage. At our next counseling session in December, I said as much. Then on Christmas day, she had a meltdown based on my reaction to a present she gave me. She attempted suicide and ended up in the hospital for a couple of days. During that time, she did the typical blaming game, however, I was done. I reached my limit. She switched meds and since that time has been completely different. She has been sweet and caring.
But I’m still not happy. If it weren’t for the kids, I would leave for sure. I’m in a weird scenario and very ambivalent about the marriage. Part of me wants to leave, but there is a certain level of comfortableness in staying (kids, financial reasons). So I have a whole new set of problems. It’s like I never thought I had a choice before and didn’t realize how unhappy I’ve been for a long time. I was so desperate to save the marriage, I didn’t stop to think why. She has been controlling and disrespectful throughout the marriage. It was toxic. I do not know if this is a honeymoon period, but I wish she wasn’t so nice now so it would make the decision easier. I don't want to be seen as the "one who left" when she was trying to work it out. How long to I wait this out? How much more time do I give myself to see if I fall back in love (if ever)? It’s like a time trap and it's painful.
Anyway, I wanted just to follow-up so others might see how this can be an interesting journey and thank everyone for their previous feedback. This is an amazing forum.
