Fighting my way out of the dark - Part 8

[Accuray]

I thought about this and came to the conclusion that she was trying to fix a temporary problem (scout campouts? meeting with OM? traveling for work?) with a permanent solution. Also, her reason makes no sense in the long run if you look at a calendar.

I agree with your work friend and with Arista but for your benefit I’ll also say this — your conclusions about XW’s motivations are pure speculation on your part — she could have a very valid reason for wanting a long term change.

The better question for you to answer is “do you really care about the proposed change?” Does it mess up your plans or your life?

Now that you’re separated one change to get used to is that you don’t have to explain yourselves to each other. XW’s reason for requesting the switch is not your business any longer, she doesn’t owe you an explanation and her reasoning doesn’t have to clear a “validity hurdle” with you.

By the same token, you don’t have to explain or justify your refusal to XW — that’s your business.

I’ve been divorced parenting for four years now and I can tell you that being willing to be flexible and cover each other is an amazing asset. Things will come up — work trips, illnesses, vacation opportunities, dating opportunities, and if you have established mutual flexibility in your willingness to change things up both of you and the boys will benefit in the long run.

Just something to think about.

Acc