I think this is the first time I've replied to your posts, so "hi"! Go ahead and get to know the guy better with another date.
I just started OLD in August and was feeling very...powerful? I think that's the word I would use, but also disappointed. I would get giddy with excitement about the possibilities and then end up comparing them to the attractive traits of XH (not so much the bad ones). I like a strong, confident guy that can hold their own with me and I kept smelling weakness under their confident presentation. Thank my over-analyzation of XH for that. So I took a break and set some boundaries ON MY PROFILE. Instead of scaring people off, I attracted a braver, more self-assured group of guys (I seriously thought I'd shot myself in the foot, at first). And after a week of conversation with one, I met him. He seemed great, but no butterflies or love at first sight. There was nothing wrong with him; he was even much better looking than his photos. I think we've all got a few scars on our hearts, so since there were no major red flags, I went on that second date. Again, he was fun to be with and interesting and I had a nice time (awkward attempt to kiss me when I wasn't expecting it not withstanding). But I got to know him better and still am not repulsed, although not feeling butterflies either. I'm remembering my comfort with XH; but I'm also realizing that its part of his job (career) to make people immediately at ease. Sometimes you just need to give someone a longer chance to grow on you and get past those scars, even if they seem to be ahead of you in the attraction (to you) department.
And...its hard not to compare someone to the ideal created by our memories of what was good in other relationships. We just have to remember that those Rs didn't make it. Maybe its time, as MWD says in trying to save our old relationships, to do a 180. Give a different tactic a try.
M-51 H-54 2D-27 and 25 M-26 yrs Bombshell and IHS 7-29-15 He moved out 10-3-15 D filed 1-27-16 D final 10-27-16
