Thanks for that lesson on self-talk and reframing. You’re absolutely right.
I need to do this to be able to move towards a positive mental space.
so you chose to ignore!
You asked me about my goals. Here they are:
These aren't goals but wishes! The exercise one is sort of okish...
Goals require the following to be effective...
Specific Positive Actionable Time and date Achievable Current Full of passion Capable of visualisation
1. Quit Smoking – Done (Just over 2 weeks now since I quit)
Quiting something isnt a goal. Its an action. The goal is always the positive. Quitting is negative.
I am an enthusiastic non smoker, today my heart and my health improves daily.
2. Become healthy – I am working out and indoor climbing
I am healthier each day and I am passionate about working out 3 times a week. One of my new fun activities is indoor climbing and I do this once a week to improve my strength and agility.
3. Improve my financial situation and career – I need to spend time to figure this out. I am getting a small promotion soon, but I needto increase my income
oh dear! Really! There is that dreaded word again! It's your favourite word? It's in your posts everywhere on the board.. using it creates resistance, remember that time you needed to do your homework? Using need creates a real barrier, it is a weasel word goes in the bin along with the word try...
this.....
I chose to focus on my finances and today I cheerfully work on my career. I happily accept a well deserved promotion and I am taking X course and discussing opportunities with my boss by seeking monthly feedback....or whatever it is you are doing
4. Become mentally and emotionally stable and stronger – doing IC and being more reflective
I haven't a clue what this means or how it can be measured. IC once a month? Keeping a journal every day? This is pie in the sky.
5. Become less controlling – been doing good with this, especially during my time with kids
This isn't a GOAL! It is a non goal. What would less controlling be like?
I allow my children to state their opinions every day and I allow them their own views. I actively seeking to talk to each child twice a week and I validate their choices......
6. Reading/Writing – it’s coming along slowly; it dropped quite a bit because I decided to put all my energies and focus into quitting smoking. I needed all my strength for that, but now I can focus on other things
Then this shouldn't be on your list.
7. Getting my blood sugars/blood pressure under control – I am doing pretty good with this now and eating better
How, deadlines, actions....
------------------ I kick started your goals but they are just samples. Can I suggest you rewrite these as goals?
Let's have something you can work towards which is measurable and gets you to where you want to go.
Over to you
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
