Ok, since you accidentally posted about your date on another thread, I'll reply here. Thoughts: - second date sounds like a fine idea. If you're still not interested after that, then you can say "sorry, not for me". But I agree with others that if it wasn't an obvious "no way", that it's reasonable to try s second date before making up your mind,
As for that immediate attraction, " one of a kind" relationship - how's that been workin' for you? Yes, it's important to feel attraction for your partner. BUT - some people with broken pickers feel that "immediate attraction" for people who are all wrong for them, or who will be guaranteed to recreate past wounds and abandonment. Some people gravitate unconsciously toward that. So you should give any guy who's not an immediate "no way" a second date and a chance to get to know them better before you decide.
As for OLD vs real life - it's all just a numbers game. You'd be incredibly lucky to hit the jackpot after dating 2, or 5, or 10 people. You need to go on a lot of coffee dates to find someone you're interested in.
Btw - what did you find that you didn't like on his FB page? I don't think it's unreasonable to take a peek (but bear in mind you will start showing up in their "you may know" recommendations and he may know you snooped. ) It would be a nonstarter for me if a guy was of a certain diametrically opposite political persuasion, or displayed racist or misogynistic tendencies on his page.
As for physical attraction - I'll admit I have a fondness for a certain "type". But I've dated men of all physical types (my ex husband actually wasn't "my type" but I found him very attractive once I knew him). Idris Elba would be my ideal but I once had a mad crush on a 5'4" white physicist. So don't limit yourself too much with comparisons to the past or ideas about instant attraction. Just try to get to know who these people are , their values, their interests, their philosophy on life.
