After my last situation I felt trapped in a corner. Thus I required lots of pondering and coaching.
I spoke to my DB coach, a psychologist and two of my counsellors and one of them helped me draft up a response to my W.
The compromise we jointly reached was to validate and give her the birth certificate but to only give her the marriage certificate if she agreed to meet with me in a safe environment (for instance at the counsellors). That way she can explain her reasoning and we can assume it is actually her (and not her step dad using her email to obtain the documents).
I also used the email to explain to her why I did not trust the STiL and gave her a list of the horrible things he had done to me. My DB coach was uncertain whether this would have a positive or negative impact because we do not know how much she knows and how she will respond to these facts. It could make or break the DB-ing attempt but I decided to take a punt and expose his actions.
Thus far she has not responded to the email however I have noticed that she left her parents apartment hours after I sent the email and has been staying at a friends' place 1.5 hrs out of town ever since (!!)
I would claim this to be a small success because my email has made her realise what awful things her parents have done to me.
In the meantime I am awaiting feedback and doing my GAL stuff.
Truthbuster.
Married 4.5, Together 6 M: 36, W: 33, no kids Separation date: 7/8/2017 Bomb dropped: 8/18/2017 Last communication: 1/8/2018 - now nothing OM confirmed - now ended (?)
