Only you know what's the best for you. It seems obvious that he cares mostly about himself, don't be fool by the crumbs of "caring" he gives you or the kids from time to time.
From previous info you shared with us, living with you is his best financial option at that time, since you are paying for most of the family expenses while he is sending a lot of money abroad. He is saving money and keeping his lifestyle... and having he household done also without having to do anything or paying for it.
Also, he can still play the dotting father while you are in fact doing most of the work. It helps to keep his image intact to others.
He is not taking you seriously about filing because he believes that he still have some power over you (you are totally into him) so you will never do it and also you backed up so many times... sorry for the 4X4. By the way, I totally understand why you threatened to file so many times and didn't do it, because it's such a major decision and you wanted so desperately to save your marriage so whatever words/promises he was saying, you were ready to believe them. If you take the time to reread your threads, you will notice that each time you were ready to walk out, he came with sweet words, promises and changed his behavior for a few days, just to calm you down. That's just plain manipulation, not real change.
Anyway, when you take a decision there is always pros and cons, just see what the best for you and your kids, but keep in mind that the behavior that your husband is modeling is not a healthy one.
Me 52+ WH 57+ Married 20 + Piecing since 2016 (ready to give up...)
