I cant even imagine what it would be like to be "separated" for 4 years.

What is the separation like? How much contact do you have? Are you also dating? Is she? What is the living arrangement?

How did this vacation come about? Have there been others? Are you spending regular 'family time' together?

Also, whats the custody arrangement?

Sorry for so many questions. Im just trying to wrap my mind around the current condition to be able to actually provide some thoughts to you!