New LBS dealing with WW (Part 5)

[Surfer]

Joe,

You will feel like it's all out of control - less frequently than before, but you still will. It is not. I can tell from what you are writing that you are doing exactly what you need to do, just keep doing it.

The conversion from the loved one to the Narcissist is stark and appalling. But it happens. They are, of course, not Narcissists. That is a very specific mental definition (like psychopathy) and they can't all be this. What I think is happening is an affair and projection in simple terms. The affair takes place then the guilt and horrible feelings inside. They project that in their behaviour. They get a release doing this and this is their payoff so they must be right in this (as it makes them feel better). Your role, as you are, is not letting them play this game. Understanding how to define boundaries, understanding TA, the Drama Triangle etc are all tools that will help you in this role. Read and study, become a Jedi in this shi! It will help you and the kids.

Exactly, you have your OWN problems. She will not accept hers and will project them onto you.

Surfer