Husband gone for second time - 3

[Jim1234]

Nicole, at about the point you're at now, I can remember going to training with some people I didn't know. During a break, the instructor was talking about his wife and asked if we were married. I had to excuse myself so I wouldn't just break down and bawl in front of them. It's painful and it hurts, but I promise, it does get better. Slowly, but it does. Some days will be worse than others, but in general, you will get better.

if he's just going to act miserable with her and keep thinking of his girlfriend I'd rather him just not come.

he can live his fantasy life with his girlfriend.

You can't force him to come spend time with his daughter, and after what he's said, I think she's better off without his visits.

You're right, though. He's living in a fantasy world. But in the real world, he owes you financial support. Something I have realized is that most men see support as something to give AFTER they've paid for all their fantasies, if there's anything left, but in reality, it should be their FIRST obligation. When you get to court, ask that his wages are garnished, so you are guaranteed support payments. This is the horrible part of divorce, but he chose to go down this path, and there are consequences in the real world.

And fantasies end. No one knows if it will play out like last time when he came back to you. But even if he did, would you really want him back the way he is? Please say "no". Even if you do save the marriage, I really hope you make him do the work he needs to do to deserve a woman as wonderful as you.