It's funny looking back everything that all the vets said where absolutely true. Early on it is very hard to see the forest through the trees and your hanging onto every word your WAS says.
Truth of the matter is like AS says they are so far gone more than you would ever know or think. By the time we all arrive the damage has been done and we are in triage mode trying to stop the bleeding. The script is all the same but everyone's WAS is different and that is the part we can't control. IMO the quicker you adapt the principals on the board the quicker you will heal but I don't think it matters at all to the WAS. Over time, potentially but not in the near future.
Anyway, I have no regrets. It has been a very rewarding journey. It is good to have hope but not so much hope that it prevents you from detaching and moving on. Detaching is definitely a process and not a light switch.
The pursuit and distance concept did not workout for me. It might have brought her closer to the extent the pressure was removed but it did not bring her closer wanting to know about my life, what I was doing, it never caused her to ask more questions or to show an interest in my comings and goings. I do know that it helped me heal which is more important.
