Newbie In Need Of Guidance

[rminer]

I agree that you need to validate your kids feelings, and not tell them they have to put up with W.

I'm not trying to tell them to put up with it, I want them to respond in the best possible way, but I can see that it sounds that way. D21 and S23 are the only ones who will stand up to her out of the kids.

Trying to put yourself in between as a buffer is just going to end badly.

This is true, but I guess I am in "protection mode" a bit with them. I still see the adult kid as children sometimes.

But do not undercut the relationship, either. That is important.

My goal is to protect their relationships.

I also agree that maybe public school would be a decent choice for the littler ones. Esp. if your wife is looking at moving out.

As I said to Acc, I think that is one of two things stopping her at this point. I wouldn't be opposed to public school at this point though. They don't need the 24 hr stress of this.