Do you think that there a lot of success stories for those in my situation?
Im sure that there are.
My advice for you is to start being patient. This is not something that will happen quickly, but rather, a long, slow journey. As you look back, you should be able to see all sorts of problems in the old relationship. Now is a time to focus on 'cleaning your side of the street'.
You talk about 'white lies' - now is maybe a time to investigate why you tell you them and how to improve that.
You talk about 'abandonment issues' - how can you better manage those?
Instead of grabbing at crumbs, focus on what you can do to improve yourself. Focus on raising a set of incredible children. Try to let the marriage take a backseat in your brain for a little bit so that you can become healthy again.
It is only then, that you will have a chance at making a lasting re-connection with H anyway.
