Enjoying the party with your children and not worrying about the W is exactly what you need to be doing. I do believe the best chance at reconciliation is giving her space and time. And even if you still end up D'ed, this is also the best way for you to start to emotionally detach and be a better person able to get on with and enjoy your life.
I'm curious how the living together after she filed is going for you since I'm in the same sitch.
