Hey FC, She's engaged me in talks about the past a few times since my last post. I've been much more calm, validating, while trying to be assertive with how I perceive things. We've been able to talk more calmly. I feel everytime she gets a little bit uncomfortable though, she'll bring up D. It's a little unsettling to hear her say it calmly vs. during a heated exchange, as in the latter I can partly chalk it up to her being angry. When she brings up her desire to D I simply say that I accept the way things are right now.
I've been keeping up with my kids' sports which keeps me busy. Coaching and attending games. They are doing so well in sports and in school. I want the M to work out so badly, as I fear D will throw them off in life.
She's actually doing things that I wished she would do prior to BD2, like helping out with the boys and attending their games more, being more financially responsible, and prioritzing the kids over her workouts. Areas where I may have been critical of her and had some resentment prior to BD2. It's like, why are you making the changes now that you want a D? I almost feel like she's rubbing it in my face, like you can't have this new and improved person. They are all positive things, don't get me wrong, but the kicker is she still wants a D.
Going to continue the unconditional love and fight to save the M.
