How a treehouse can cost you your marriage 2

[Vanilla]

You asked for my thoughts and at this point I am quite confused.

Some things don't make sense to me.

There are so many troubles and mixed messages.

Firstly I think your whole family is a pressure keg waiting to blow. Let me deal with an important issue which is very obvious to me. Please do not use your D13 to tell your wife she is behaving badly. This is extremely destructive to your child. And your children are the most important. CHILDREN COME FIRST.

Your W involved the police and made false accusations. This is extremely and I mean extreme behaviour. And without a full apology and atonement from W, which would include putting the record straight with the court and taking full responsibility is going to be a permanent damage to your M. It is wholly unacceptable.

Clearly forgiveness is not possible until W does atone.

Even if there is no OM this behaviour is wilful and wayward. It is almost impossible to resolve and the underlying anger will erupt. Quite rightly.

I see a very clear sweet cycle. And I smell a rat.

On the other hand, your life is way out of balance. I see no permanent change in it and it will cause you great physical damage as well as psychological damage. There are periods when work hours are long, we all do this in tough times. It is really damaging as a way of life.

Your W comes back when she is broke, wants no sexual connection with you? Wants everything on her Terms?

Yes, I know you have a hand in the demise of your M. I get it. I also get that you want W in your life.

I also see you have no life, and in due course your health will crack as I sense you are not looking after you!

There are at least 10 posters have commented on this, in very eloquent ways, with force. Yet you rationalise and excuse and deflect. Always contradicting when it isn't what you want to hear.

If you are hoping I will say differently then that's true.

I am.

I am saying ask W to move back out before its too late. My great concern is that you will lose your rag and then the police will be called. Next time will be different, you may lose access to your kids, your lIving and your home. That prospect looks high risk to me. Have you an L.

You do not have to forgive W for her actions. You know what she did and so do I. I am not fooled by it. It is a typical abuse pattern.

At this point I believe you are exceedingly vulnerable in almost every way I can think of. And being wayward isn't just about OM, it's about a lifestyle.

You have my thoughts.

V