Just a quick update: h plans to move out next week. He again tried to get me to drop my L. H said I should fire my L and then just run things through him (h). He said he can ask HIS lawyer stuff. I can't tell if he's stupid or just playing stupid. Probably it's a bit of both. His own lawyer has said to h that he can't legally counsel both of as he is h's lawyer. Sigh.
He tried raging on me via email until my L told him to knock it off. Then he tried guilting me into firing my L. When that didn't work he went gangster and told me I am his "sworn enemy." Hmm, did not realize I am divorcing Tony Soprano.
The best part of this whole "drop your lawyer and work through me" plan is that he is ignoring me 100% of the time. He acts like I don't exist. He is in the dorm room and when I get home he scurries off to his apartment I assume. If I am in a room he turns around and walks out. Tonight he walked out of the kitchen when I walked I. and when I came into the hall to go upstairs, he had his back turned to a wall and he just stood here waiting for me to pass.
He acts giddy a lot. He puts on this cheerful voice with the kids and I do think he is very excited for his new life. I saw this same behavior at BD.
Turns out he's just as sneaky as I thought he was. That claim of his that we separated in 2016 is so that he can claim any profits on investments beyond that date. Many of the financial documents he presents as joint show account balances ending that 2016 date. I suspect he was putting joint money in there and claiming it is now his as we were already separated. I am starting to see why he pushed so hard to get me to sign that I agreed to the division of assets. Definitely his plan was to shock me and then get me to just agree fast so I had no time to think.
If we were separated in 2016 then it's a complete surprise to me and every single other person who knows us (including our own children). We still had joint accounts, filed as married, he still wore his ring, he never told anyone we separated and he moved back into the MBR during that time.
At times he's emailed that we will be friends after this is done. But he really refuses to look me in the eye at all. And if I don't do what he wants how he wants he comes up with all these gangster lines: you're dead to me or you're my enemy now.
I keep telling myself I will get through this and build a normal life again.
Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13 BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room" 8/15: H back to MBR 10/15: H back in dorm room 1/18: H files, now divorced
