Picking up Her MESS #2

[marina7]

Vanilla,
Again thank you for kind words and encouragement. I no longer worry about her yes 4 months ago I was a wreck but it's getting easier but when I see my kids affected by this now the momma bear is in protective mode I am and I know I will be getting s9 soon as W abandon her FAMILY and then separated siblings. What I am concern is like I told my lawyer if she can't even say hi to them for 5 seconds how is she really going be with them alone. God knows am not keeping them away am just trying to keep there mental stage ok. She is very verbal I just want supervise visit with her until she receives help first for herself and then she could worry about kids.
I am in Illinois our state is 50/50 parenting but again due to her actions things will be different. I also have came to peace if she doesn't want to be part of there life either but I just wish she will say that to her lawyer or me. But again who knows what is going on with her mind. I honestly till this day before coming here I thought she just stop loving me or never in love I never label her even my lawyer ask is she a narcissist I honestly didn't know what that met at first then I read it. At the end W is fighting some demons not my circus not my monkey's I just want peace in my life and my 3 kids together and us 4 keep going to therapy and taking it all day at a time. But is hard dealing with someone like W. But Thank you again and I'll take all advice and books and anything I can learn from to help my kids get through this rough time in our LIFE.