Survive, I can tell you first-hand that it keeps coming back until they get through and it takes a very long time. I never realized it until I wrote that post to you, but I have been holding his hand through this death of our marriage and his crisis and consoling him while I have largely ignored my own grief and my own needs. Ultimately, I think I am doing it so I have no regrets later on because I fear for him where his life is heading based on what I have read and what he has done. I have no regrets with my dad, but then again he did not choose to leave me and he did not leave me for someone (or a series of someone) else.
You are a very progressive and evolved person. It seems that you're built for there to be multiple "someones" in your life and you expect that as your reality. I think you are more in touch with your own needs and wants than your average person. Based on that, it is completely understandable that you would be able to view this decision in a more detached way and would be able to reach a place of self-healing faster than a lot of us old fashioned, romantic-leaning, fixers.
You have every right to be done here. You have endeavored to do the right thing and support him through his crisis. He also seems far more in touch with his feelings than others. He will likely weather the storm and deal with the wreckage better than most as a result. Also, his OW (in this case EX/OM) has been in his life a long time and he knows what that picture is going to look like for him.
My guess is that you will be able to pull off the proverbial friendship following breakup. That all of you will be enlightened and forward-looking and decent.
That's really a wonderful picture if it frees you from a place you don't want to wait anymore.
I hope that if you do go there, you will still stop in and tell us how you are doing and what you have learned. You have so many things to teach.
