You sound well, Blu... As a WW, during the early days of piecing, I carried heavy guilt... My H didn't put it on me... He was kind to me... But I felt awful and sorry and even undeserving... I walked on eggshells and was hypersensitive to anything that came up regarding infidelity... Whether in a movie or song... We both like The Eagles music... In the past whenever Lying Eyes came on, we could sing along... But when we first started piecing, I could not listen to it in front of him...
Eventually, I had to get past carrying around the burden of guilt... We worked through that in MC... He didn't want me to go through the rest of our lives together beating up myself... As time goes on, almost 3 years since reconciliation, the crime is further and further away... But it is not belittled with time, just not as near... And so I am lighter...
And I can finally look ahead... We could not do that for a while... We could only see the past and the present... But now, yes, we look ahead authentically... Not just in words... I hope this makes sense...
