I was afraid you would say that. In your opinion, does that make this process harder or easier?
I guess I read what you meant the wrong way. She is lying to herself. It's part of her waywardness, just like the tremendous resentment she holds, and just like her blaming you for everything that goes wrong. Maybe she means it when she says it, but it is still a lie. The why could be for a couple of reasons. When she comes out of her fantasy, she'll have to admit the truth to herself.....or choose to operate on a lie. That's one of the things that will determine if she returns all the way.......or not. That is why a LBH should never take back his WW until she does the necessary work on her heart. Otherwise, he won't have his old W, he'll have a WW who has not shed her resentment. Her bad behavior will begin again if he takes her back too easily.
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More to show sympathy, really. I know how aggravating it is to have chargers disappear because mine have gone missing quite a few times. I was trying to convey that I understood her frustration. I should have just said it instead of acting on it too?
When she wants to blame everyone else rather than taking responsibity, I don't agree with showing sympathy. I saw it as you trying to rescue her. Not your job.
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You mentioned earlier a Transparency Plan. I am not seeing anything on this here. I see "transparency" but no referrals to "plan."
I will try to explain tomorrow.
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Will I get to it in the DR book?
No.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
