IMHO, a WW has to have her feet held to the fire.......in order to come back all the way. The MC sessions have been put to the side for a while, she won't make appointment for IC, and it appears there may be a slack in transparency. Even if she has not directly contacted the OM, she is putting herself in a vulnerable position by getting too slack in these areas. She is blaming you in some of her responses about the ring, etc. To me, attitude shows what's in the heart.

It seems so incredible that she just "doesn't get it". If she didn't get it, then why play the games and give you the flimsy excuses for missing two exits, staying so late after work, going close by the OM's hangout, and other things she's done? I think she gets it enough to cover her tracks.

I am not surprised by her reaction, especially about having sex. 15 yrs is a long time to live together without being intimate. She probably does resent it. And she resented your statements about working toward having an intimate MR. Her sexual desire may not be in tune to you, but that's not to say it can't happen. She needs to do some work on her heart. If she does the heart work, she'll get in tune to you.

If I had not had someone working with me, holding my feet to the flame......I doubt I would be here writing this post tonight.

((hugs))

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!