I guess the good news is, I recognize this and I'm trying to work through it, but I'm also frustrated that there's so much more damage to my psyche that I've probably not uncovered yet.
I want to be in a healthy relationship and have a healthy marriage someday and yet I get down on myself that maybe I'm not as together as I want to be and I don't know if I'll ever be the healthy partner.
Also, it would be nice to have a good man in my life who likes me for me. Not that I need a man to validate my worthiness.... But it would be nice for a little somethin somethin....
Hey ya Pax! Good to see you posting!
I think recognizing you feel this way is half the battle...seriously. Like bfly says, we all have issues here. I’m certainly damaged mainly due to ex in more ways than one. It is hard to get through and fix. But once you realize it, then you can work on it. I’ve never been to an IC so I do not know what that’s like. But if you think that will help, I encourage you to go. You have already done a tooooon of work and you should be proud of how far you have come. You just have this one last hurdle to get over... you got this!
Oh, by the way, with the route you are taking in terms of dating and your next relationship, I feel pretty confident in saying that you will find a man who loves you (yes loves not like!) for who you are. By that I mean you seem to be taking your time, not jumping into anything and really learning about yourself. That is an important step that a lot of people miss going through this process. I know it is cliche, but you have to learn to love yourself first.
Just keep on keeping on Pax! You are doing great!
And when in doubt, just repeat and remember... “I’m good enough. I’m smart enough. And gosh darn it... people like me.” ;-)
