Again? You've already tried that route, and it was nothing more than a temp check.
Quote:
“Ok can you please sign the papers then and file them or tell me when you do and I’ll pick them up to file them“
"No more meet & talk. I have signed the papers, but it will be up to you to file".
Chris, I doubt she's going to run file the papers, b/c she has dragged this out and tried to place the responsibility on you. She'll either continue with the game, or she'll make a decision. Hopefully, her decision will be to get her act together. She may file, eventually, but at least you would know.....instead of playing this game of hers.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
On 1/9 you can see from above W texted "ok can you please sign the papers then...". I did not respond to this and then she sent "This is ridiculous". I did not respond to this either.
The next day; 1/10 I texted her to ask her if she will be in town this coming weekend bc I want to get all the wedding stuff out of my folks house and sort it all out/split it up between us. She responded with "as of now". I just responded with "OK". Then the wheels fell off. I guess I am just not strong enough to continue to put myself through this life of limbo; I either want it over or I want her to recon. The following is a string of texts we had on 1/10; after I asked her about this coming weekend.
W: No response from you on anything else I have said over the last few days?
Me: I can see how and why you are feeling furn and upset. I cannot lie and say I even know one percent of what you go through every year during this time of the year. The situation we put eachother in is very tough and I can understand why you feel the way you do.
W: So knowing that...u didnt think it was the right thing to do to respond to me on xmas or the days after or on new years or these last few days? I dont even know what situation were in anymore or why we're not just ending this. U dont even respond to me.
Me: I am sorry for how my actions made you feel hurt and upset. I explained I would not be part of a R if it was not genuine. I also never said I would stand in your way if you wanted a D.
W: Ok. Not genuine...? Ok. Will you please sign and fill out those docs then and let me know when I can pick them up.
Me: I will bring them over on the 20th, when we split up the wedding stuff.
W: Ok
Radio silence since that conversation which ended on 1/10. I am going to see her on the 20th (this saturday) and we are going to split up the wedding gifts we have not used yet and go over the dissolution papers. She already filled them out for those not up to date on my sitch; so we will just walk through everything she has documented before signing.
M:30 W:28 T:9 MR:2.5 NoKids Seperation 1: 9/16-12/16 Move back in: 1/17 BD: 8/15 She moved out: 9/1
I will say this, I just went down south to visit a friend for 5 days. I have mentally been doing so well with this whole thing, and I am finally seeing I do not want this current R/M. There is no way in Hades I will ever put up with this in the future. I have gained so much knowledge from therapy, self help books, and just being on my own. I am actually excited for who ever I share my life with in the future. I am going to continue and work on myself through this whole thing.
M:30 W:28 T:9 MR:2.5 NoKids Seperation 1: 9/16-12/16 Move back in: 1/17 BD: 8/15 She moved out: 9/1
I will say this, I just went down south to visit a friend for 5 days. I have mentally been doing so well with this whole thing, and I am finally seeing I do not want this current R/M. There is no way in Hades I will ever put up with this in the future. I have gained so much knowledge from therapy, self help books, and just being on my own. I am actually excited for who ever I share my life with in the future. I am going to continue and work on myself through this whole thing.
Chris, this is a great post by you and I can see you have grown a lot through this experience.
She has moved out on you twice in the 3 years you have been married. You have no children together. IMO she needs to do a lot of work before you should even consider getting back together.
I will say this, I just went down south to visit a friend for 5 days. I have mentally been doing so well with this whole thing, and I am finally seeing I do not want this current R/M. There is no way in Hades I will ever put up with this in the future. I have gained so much knowledge from therapy, self help books, and just being on my own. I am actually excited for who ever I share my life with in the future. I am going to continue and work on myself through this whole thing.
Good for you! No matter what your future holds, or who is in it, hold on to that thought and never let go of it.
