About the custody thing... shared custody in NOT supported by law, unless you of course agree to it BUT in practical terms that really is not what you want. The kid needs to have a place he knows he belongs to (a fixed address etc.)
So that means it's gotta be either my W or I then. The thing is though that in as much as 99% of the case where custody is disputed, the courts WILL rule in favor of the mother because we have a pretty traditional court system where this subject matter is concerned.
In other words, if we fight over it, i WILL lose unless i can somehow prove that she is COMPLETELY inept (say she were a junkie and i could prove it or other extreme cases) which is definitely NOT the case at ALL at this point and it is not what i want!!
I want our son to have a good relationship to his mother as well as to me and i believe she knows this and thinks the same so we should be able to find some kind of agreement i hope.
On an unrelated note... I truly hope she will make it through this thing someday because even if our love may be lost forever, i want to be able to talk to the sensible, good person that i KNOW is in there again some day and hopefully she will understand why i did what i did to survive, because right now i can see her somehow "reaching out" to me pretty often but it's fast lived and shallow, she is not ready for anything serious by a LONG shot (i believe you guys call it not "baked" and who knows whether she ever will be again...
