So, on a different subject, being my ex and my daughter......

She still expresses much frustration about her father being mean to her. She told me he swears at her, and he said he would stop after he wrote him the letter (over a year ago) but he is still mean. She doesn't want to talk to him because she is "scared" And I know what she means by scared is that he won't listen and she will be ignored. I know that all so well, because I lived my life that way with him. I hurt for her. I don't know how to make this better. She loves him so much, she does have good times with him, but he just doesn't know how to control himself. He has no patience for things not going the way he thinks they should. He gets mean and nasty when they don't.

This conversation was sparked by D10 seeing a car pulled over. She says "daddy drives like a maniac and he never gets pulled over and when he does, his badge gets him out of it" This I also know to be true. She said " Daddy never gets in trouble" I also know this to be true. my ex and his father never suffer consequences. Except for that one time they both had DWI's within 3 months of each other.......I took this as a teaching moment to tell her that poor behavior more often that not leads to consequences, just because your dad doesn't have any, doesn't mean nobody does.

I also made a joke to her that when she goes to the Maroon 5 concert to give Adam Levine my number (she said they have super close tickets) She said "Mom, he has a wife and a child!" At the very least, my daughter knows right from wrong.

And one last interesting observation. She got a 50% on a math quiz and was beside herself. She actually cried. I wasn't mad, I know sometimes she psyches herself out. She had a math test 2 days later and got a 96%. She knows her math better than I do. I had asked her if dad asks about her grades, or if she tells them to him. She said "no, why would I? What is he going to do?"

I parent alone. We don't coparent. He babysits. For the 10 years of her life, it's been just me.

But hey, him and OW are taking her ice skating today!