Hello Job Thanks for your response. Yes I do feel strong I try to interact more from a point of passion not anger. I guess I reached a point knowing all my efforts to wake him up are useless.
Looking inside I was afraid of being a divorced woman and a single mom. Somehow maybe that is cultural acceptance or financial stability. Now I reached a stage maybe I am embarrassed of my status not married and not divorced. It seems that divorced is better than abandoned not infront of people but infront of myself . I realized I need to go through my fears now and go ahead with divorce .
Well yes I guess he might be shocked that after 4 years of emotional abuse I decided to move on. Or maybe he wants to play it in a way that he will feel good about his myself. No answer yet but I had expected it.
And truthly speaking better so that I know that he thought thoroughly of his answer.
I on the other hand feel good with the situation and looking forward to move on with my life without any stupid fantasies that he might ever come back.
M 45 H 45 D1 12 D2 9 BD 04/14 Living two different state Not officially separated
