I could be off base. It certainly feels like I'm letting her win. I suppose it doesn't have anything to do with masculinity in the grand scheme of things.
You might be right, in some cases. However, I don't think it's healthy for you to look at who is winning. When someone is showing the type of behavior you see in your W, and when kids are in the middle of it......you protect your child. It is a toxic environment, and it appears to be getting worse. Frankly, I don't see her changing while you stay there. Staying there and battling it out is not winning, and it's not fair to the boys.
In this particular case, I don't see masculinity having anything to do with it. Don't look at it as if she's kicking you out. It is your choice to leave.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
There is only one thing to focus on. And that is you my friend.
Wobbles happen. It is only your fear though. You can overcome that. For you and the kids. Focus. Be you. The you that you know. Sadly we loose sight of who we are. It is temporary however. I promise you. I have done what you are doing. Been what you are. I got through for me and the kids and so will you my friend.
I am so much more happy now.
It seemed to be endless pain. Years and years for me. Same as yours but probably lots longer. Hurt like i have never felt before bot hurt I no longer really remember. It goes in the same way the pain of an injury goes. It hurts at the time. But, in time, you forget the pain but remember it happenend.
I can only tell you the pain will go. The memories will too fade, of the hard times, I promise you will be fine my friend. You and the kids will be happy.
Buck up and be strong.
Surfer.
Last edited by Cadet; 01/13/1809:41 PM. Reason: Start a new thread message
M46/W40/D8/S6/T20/M12/Separated 6/2016,W takes kids Issues2009 Wpartying w/g.f's2013on EA2013PAdeniedWleavesMBR ImeetAP/EAhalts VariousBDDates MFCourse WSpew EAresumes I halt Wrages DBIng4/2016
You are standing for both of your kids. Keep going on that. You have to protect them from all of that nasty environment. And it is no easy to do. You should remain calm and take care of your health too...
