The Fab 5 and Dad

[J5K]

I hope everyone is well.

Here of some highlights from my last post in May.

4 of the 5 boys are in school. Academically 3 are doing well. S8 struggles and the school has been great in getting help for him. XW still does not have a job and will not pay for tutoring.

S6 and S7 struggle with their behavior at school. S4 was just kicked out of daycare for behavior issues.

The school district has helped in getting a child psychiatrist involved to help S5 and S7.

Of the 5 boys, all will end up on medication of some sort to help. Although it is not my preference, I hope this will help them. XW has agreed to this which is surprising to me.

XW has now learned to call within the window of time agreed to in the judgement. She also continues to speak to me with criticism as if she has a say on what goes on in our daily lives. I just end up politely hanging up most of the time.

She continues to only see the boys once a month. Last fall she saw them only once the weekend before Halloween. Since I have the boys every US Thanksgiving she did not visit them in November or December. She was supposed to have them for 2 weeks this past Christmas break and she said she wanted to be fair so she took them the first week of January. She stated she wanted them from December 23rd through December 29 or 30th, when I said that it would be better if she took them the second week, she agreed and said she would take them from January 1st through the 7th. I brought up that she hasn’t spent a NYE with them in 2 years and her response was I would not let her.

She continues to choose not to work. She is still seeing the same man and goes out and enjoys her life, continues to take vacations, etc while contributing the minimum required for the kids. When I bring up issues and we communicate through the court appointed app her responses continue to be blaming and negative.

I usually ignore and do not respond to those comments.

The boys and I are in a good place, are things perfect, no, but we smile and laugh a lot and I enjoy watching them each develop their own personalities.

The most recent psychiatrist that is working with the boys is very good. I look forward to working with him more to help the boys and myself be the best we can.

The only thing I feel sad about is that I had an amazing person come into my life a year ago and lost an R with a person who the boys were getting attached to. This past year I was in a very dark place and lost perspective of what i truly wanted. I don’t know why I continue to only learn after I lose someone in my life. If it wasn’t for this person I think I would still be in a dark place. I don’t like that I pushed away a person that did everything they could to be kind and supportive to me and my boys. I truly did not want her to be the rebound person.