Newbie In Need Of Guidance

[LH19]

Ok. This all has to stop immediately. Especially if she knows you know she is having an A this will make you look pathetic in her eyes. I know that is harsh but at this point and time you can not nice her back. I know it seems like the logical thing to do but it will actually make things worse right now.

What can you do? The opposite of what you think you should do. Give her space giver her all the space in the world. Stop pursuit immediately. Start to make a great life for you and your kids. Exercise, connect with old friends, spend time with family, read self help books, finish the house your building and definitely consider individual counseling.

You will most likely get a chance at recon but that is going to be along way down the road. You most likely can't make things better right now but you can certainly make them worse. This is probably going to be the hardest thing you will ever go through but if you do the hard work you will get through and be happy again with or w/o your W.

Print out Sandi's rules from the home work page and start implementing them immediately. We are here to help!

My problem with this is that she already says I don't love/want/need her. Wouldn't that just be confirming it to her?

That’s all BS she is telling you as an excuse to why she is having an affair.

No I mean out the affair to just her and let her no what your boundaries are. I Ihighly recommend you read up on boundaries and discuss it here first. If you are going to set them you have to be prepared to enforce them if broken.

I have to say you are handling this well most guys are a complete mess when they get here!