Thanks for your input OwnIt and Job. Yes, the term Stander is from another forum. Is it called Divorce Busting here?
OwnIt: In my situation, the ring came off once H told me he was done and moving on with his new life (at BD). He considered himself emotionally divorced immediately, and since the legal divorce is undesirable atm for financial reasons, this was all he needed to consider himself out of the marriage.
Since he was so adamant the marriage was over and telling everyone as well, I didn't want to keep wearing the ring. It just felt odd to do so under the circumstances and had nothing to do with my position. I didn't want to have to explain to anyone why I continued wearing it either.
Also, the general advice is to 'let them go, give them space, NO pressure, gal as if they are never coming back. How does wearing the ring come into that? That could say to H that I'm NOT letting you go, laying a guilt trip on you, not giving you space, and not gal but staying right where I am. Isn't that a form of pressure? I could see my H running further into the hills in those early days and maybe disappearing altogether. As it is now, he is in touch every few days and possibly worried already that he might lose me. Maybe not, but it's always H who initiates the contact every few days.
Job - I like your suggestion - wear another ring on that finger and wear the wedding ring on the right hand. I have the perfect ring to wear as well. I know I personally would not be that comfortable wearing the wedding ring as I did when we were together. I do want to wear something though.
Still curious though how others handled the ring situation and how it affected anything (or not).
