Thank you Bright, Ownit and Survive. Such good info. Bright much thanks on asking if lawyers litigate; many do not I have learned.
Spent the morning talking to lawyers on consults and I feel better. I understand the process now and my rights for the next few steps. I understand that I have 30 days to sign the petition. And although he is telling me we have to agree on division of assets this weekend, that is far from true. We have to go through a period of discovery. It is a process and not an overnight one.
Read the papers and h claims we separated 3/15. That is when he moved downstairs but that summer he took us all away for my birthday, bought me roses, we slept in the same bed and then he moved back into the MBR until October 15. Not sure it matters as it seems in my state things hinge on the 10 year mark and we are all past that. Wonder why he wrote it? Did he forget or is he angling. I'll know soon enough.
Today there was an email from him asking me to let him know if I was signing today or not. He will do this to me every day of this process, I realize. As Survive says, it's his maniac emergency, not mine. I hear Wonka: stay calm and don't engage. I do not think it will be possible to work with his energy as KML advises because he is too irrational. If I don't agree to asset division right there on the spot without a lawyer, then he spews. There is no making him happy except to agree with his horrible logic. I know now that he is looking to justify just as he did in the early days. Your eggs are overlooked I am out of here! You won't sign the petition the second it comes? You are hostile and dead to me.
Woke up this morning after my 4th day of running a massive sleep deficit. First thought was: I've been here before, I did it once and I'll do it again. Then I will be done. This is just like the days after BD1 was he was frenetic, everything was an emergency; he was living a pell mell existence. And I tried to appease because I was too enmeshed to see how crazy it all was. But this time I see it's nuts. And I am going to center myself for this last and final storm.
Have a consult tomorrow with the lawyer my friend recommended. Pretty sure he'll be my guy based on her experience and his reviews.
Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13 BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room" 8/15: H back to MBR 10/15: H back in dorm room 1/18: H files, now divorced
