Yeah. It is difficult to maintain the pace, when you see no finish line.
It is hard as h$ll but try to think about the finish line being for you and not restoring your MR.
The point is to find the enjoyment in the process, not in getting over the finish line. Think it this way... what is the finish line? You getting your S back? I'd encourage you to read some reconciliation threads. It is hard has heck. Getting it all done and happily in M again? Are you sure that when you get there, you can just be? Marriage is work. It's hard work. Any other goals in your life? Think about it.
My point is that there is no finish line - the finish line is when you are at your death bed taking your final grasp of air before your heart stops beating. There are only individual steps that create the entire journey - small steps that have easily defined outcomes. Reach for those steps. Break them down as much as you need to. Stop believing in finish lines and start to enjoy the journey. Life has a lot in store for you but no one is going to just give everything for you, you have to get it all yourself.
There are lots of ways to find your own happiness. I really find it comforting and it creates happiness for me that we humans are naturally learners - we are not from a mold. You just have to get your natural curiosity back. You will never know everything but you can continuously learn new things. Passions are created by experimenting, no one is born with a passion.
In my thirties, BDd 2017, divorced 2 young kids new relationship
