Wonka,

Welcome back! I am very happy to see that you returned to provide support and guidance to HaWho.

I tend to agree that anything you put in writing should remain short, simple and very plain language. He will stop reading when he sees that you state everything should go through the lawyers or you are having a lawyer do this or that.

He's got some real control issues going on and he's trying to control everything right down to the person you need to get info from. Furthermore, if the accountant starting talking to his family about the situation, etc., that would sound like an ethical issues as anything that is discussed or request of him should be kept confidential. I suspect that your h just threw that in hoping to deter you from getting the info you require.

HaWho, you have more control over this situation than you think. He's scrambling to have control and wants you to think that he knows anything and everything and yes, he wants to come off as the good guy in giving you this or that...don't be fooled by his promises because all of that may change the longer this goes on. Any leads on a lawyer?

Once you get the accounts taken care of today and you've posted a text to him about things, try to refrain from having any more discussions w/him about the divorce or dividing assets. The time for those discussions will be after you have retained a lawyer and gotten good legal advice.

This is now a business deal and you need to try to treat it as such. Your partner wants out, so you need to look at him as a business partner. I know you are going through some emotional ups and downs, but you will need to stay as calm as you can. He will use threats, be nice one time and nasty the next if he doesn't get what he wants...but whatever you do, stay calm, count to ten, do not react to his antics and the one thing that you need to do often is breathe!

Stay the course...we are here for you. Continue to ask questions and be sure to make a list of questions for your lawyer.


Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.